Jesus Still Delivers: Elisa’s Story of Freedom From Darkness
- Christy Boulware
- 1 day ago
- 11 min read
In March of 2024, we met a woman named Elisa. She came in covered in darkness, wearing a dark beanie and clothes that seemed to hide every part of her. Everything about her posture and presence seemed to say, “Don’t come near me.”
She made sarcastic comments to our leadership that felt intended to offend us or push us away so we would leave her alone. But we saw through it all and kept pursuing her with love, intentionality, and the space she needed to build trust.
By the end of the retreat, with only minutes left before departure, she agreed to let us pray over her. At that moment, a wall broke down. A seed was planted that she really was loved.
A year later, at our March 2025 retreat, Elisa came back. She was still hesitant, but more open than the year before. During dinner, I purposely chose to sit next to her. She stared me down. If I could have read her thoughts, they would have said, "Don't you dare sit next to me. Don't you dare talk to me. Don't you dare try to help me."
But here is what you need to know. My spiritual eyes saw past the darkness hovering in and around her, and I saw hope. I saw the light of Jesus inside of her. My spiritual eyes saw a broken, wounded, deeply damaged woman who needed freedom. I knew this was a divine dinner date, so I did not let the cold stares and short answers intimidate me.
I asked, "Elisa, do you feel blocked from God?"
She quickly said, "Yes."
Then I asked, "Do you feel a darkness around you that you cannot get away from?"
Again, she quickly said, "Yes."
What I had been suspecting was ringing true. I knew I needed to keep asking questions, even though everything about her physical posture was screaming, "You better shut up and stop asking me questions."
So I continued.
"Elisa, would you like us to pray for you and ask the darkness to leave?"
She stopped and stared me down. It was as if her spirit and physical body were at war. Then she answered, "Yes, I want it to leave," as tears started to form in her eyes.
I told her we would love to pray with her, but that we needed to go somewhere private where the team and I could surround her in prayer.
Minutes later, Shaunna and I and two other prayer warriors were sitting with her, ready to contend for her freedom.
How did we get to this moment?
For years, I have met with women one-on-one and sensed darkness inside of them. Sometimes it is behind their eyes. Sometimes it is in the chaotic and unholy things they say about themselves or others. Sometimes it is in words that practically scream, I have darkness inside of me, please help me. It sounds like phrases such as, "I'm comfortable with darkness," or, "I feel blocked when I pray. I can't even speak the name of Jesus."
This is not to be overly dramatic or scary. It is to inform. As real as God is, so is evil. I have experienced darkness from a mental health perspective that is bone-chilling. So dark that it tempted me to take my own life. No one can convince me otherwise. It is brutally ugly, deeply evil, and unfortunately invisibly real.
People often think of the devil or evil showing up in profound, obvious, in-your-face ways. But what if it shows up as confusion, chaos, intrusive thoughts, unholy and embarrassing shame, anger, rage, unforgiveness, hidden counterfeit comforts, lack of self-control, or thoughts of self-harm and self-sabotage?
What if the kingdom of darkness has become so comfortable in our souls that confession, forgiveness, and most importantly, the name of Jesus being spoken and called upon brings freedom?
What if we have been duped? What if we have been calling mania, multiple personalities, and borderline personality, severe depression and anxiety, a clinical label, when all along it is demonic forces disrupting a holy body that only Jesus can uproot and destroy?
For all my clinicians and scientific minds, please do not give up on me. I am not negating science, brain chemistry, or real mental health disorders that medication and therapy can help heal. I am simply suggesting that sometimes it may be demonic, and masking a demon with a diagnosis may keep a person from healing. Other times, nothing demonic is involved, and healing from trauma and taking medication may be the most holy route.
What if Christianity has believed a huge lie that someone sealed by the Holy Spirit cannot still be influenced or demonized by the devil? I realize this is a bold statement, yet I have scriptural and experiential proof to back my claim
Now back to Elisa.
We started with a little small talk, and then I felt compelled to ask her, "Can you speak the name of Jesus?" I asked because I knew enough about her story that Jesus was her Lord and that she has been following him since childhood. Yet, with her words, and actions, I could tell she was being blocked from receiving His love.
She looked me directly in the eye with fierce, vile intensity and said, in a voice that did not sound like her own. It was deeper, almost robotic sounding. "I would rather stab myself in the neck than speak the name of Jesus."
My co-laborer Shaunna and I knew what we were up against. A demon had the audacity to speak up.
I asked Elisa if she wanted freedom.
Through tears and so much tenderness, she said in her voice, "Yes. I can't live like this anymore. There is no other way."
She confessed her sins, and those confessions opened a door into her soul, exposing the places where the kingdom of darkness had made its home.
I called in a few more prayer warriors, and as she confessed, forgave those who had deeply hurt her, and surrendered those places to Jesus, the door to the enemy's work in her life began to close. Then, in the authority of the name of Jesus, we prayed and asked the evil at work in her life to leave.
Nothing wild. Nothing crazy. Just prayer, love, surrender, confession, forgiveness, and using the authority Jesus Christ died to give us. No hype. No striving. No manipulation. No putting on a show. Just believers gathered around a hurting woman, full of compassion, peace, and the presence of God.
I know this kind of prayer can carry a lot of misconceptions. People often assume it has to be weird, loud, chaotic, or emotionally out of control. But that was not what this was. This was simple, grounded, powerful prayer. The kind of prayer that listens to the Holy Spirit, stays anchored in the name of Jesus, and lovingly helps a person renounce what is not of God and receive the freedom that is.
There is a holy authority available to believers, and too many people are either afraid of it, misunderstand it, or have only seen unhealthy expressions of it. But setting captives free does not have to be spooky to be powerful. It does not have to be dramatic to be real. Sometimes the most powerful moments of freedom happen quietly, tenderly, and in a room filled with love.
The next day, she got baptized.
She took that step to proclaim to the world for herself that Jesus had saved her and that He is Lord. She literally said after her baptism that she felt like she was floating. She feels like she still is today! I sang Amazing Grace after her baptism, something the Holy Spirit led me to do. Little did I know that song was used to torment her prior to this moment, and now this song brought peace, joy and love to her soul. It was truly “Amazing Grace” on display!
On the last day of the retreat, she also turned over the Xanax she had become dependent on and has not touched those pills since. When Jesus sets you free, He does not just free your soul. He begins breaking the grip of the things that once held you captive. The very things you leaned on to survive, cope, numb, or make it through can begin to lose their power when His freedom takes root. That is what made this moment so powerful. Jesus was not only setting Elisa free from darkness, but also from the dependency that had been holding her back.
A true new creation in Christ.
Once captive, now set free.
She is a totally new person.
Smiling.
Talking.
Living free.
And that kind of freedom is still available today. Elisa’s story is not just a testimony of what Jesus did for her. It is a reminder of what He is still able to do for anyone who is desperate, willing, and ready to let Him in. No darkness is too deep. No bondage is too strong. No shame is too heavy. No past is too messy for the freedom and healing power of Jesus.
So if you are reading this and feel stuck, oppressed, harassed, numb, ashamed, addicted, tormented, or far from God, please hear me. There is hope for you too. Jesus still heals. Jesus still delivers. Jesus still restores. He still breaks chains, lifts the heavy weight off weary souls, and makes people new.
We hope Elisa’s story gives you hope, but even more than that, we hope it points you to the One who can do the same kind of transforming FEARLESS work in your life.
Written by Christy Boulware
Elisa Wrote Her Story Out As Well In 2023, my best friend went to a Fearless Retreat. Like many of us, she went hesitant but trusting of someone she knew who had gone the year before. She went from texting me from her car in the parking lot on Friday afternoon, needing to be encouraged to go inside, to calling me on her way home Sunday and saying, “I have to see you. I have to tell you about my weekend.”
Not having spoken to her all weekend, I had no idea what she was dying to tell me. I'm telling you this because the smile that greeted me is what planted the desire to want that same feeling. Over the next year, she carried that smile, and she was different. A good different. I wanted this.
March of 2024 rolls around, and I'm filled with my usual anxiety and depression, but now the fear of the unknown. It took convincing to get me to go inside. I didn't even take my luggage in because I had no intention of staying. This was her thing, not mine. We were separated in our small groups, and I was surrounded by women who were open and honest about their feelings.
This openness and bravery gave me overwhelming anxiety. I sat quietly, determined not to participate. I spent the entire weekend avoiding Shaunna and Christy. It was during one of our Be Still times that I was sitting on the floor alone and told God, “Ok, show me.”
I opened my Bible. There are the words “Follow Me.” All the words on that page in the Book of John, and that's what caught my eyes. Ok, God, I'm listening.
So I met Shaunna and Christy Sunday before we left to release everything I was carrying. That weekend left me hungry for more. I was still fighting the enemy through the next year. I still did not believe I deserved His love.
March 2025, I reluctantly agreed to go to retreat for a second year. Still wanting what Lynell got out of it, but still determined not to lower my walls. I've worked hard to build the walls and not let anyone in. Being vulnerable is not something I am willing to do.
Lynell gets sick, and I'm on my own for this trip. I pulled into numerous gas stations to turn around. Every time I stopped, I looked at that smile. The smile of freedom.
This year was no different. I was anxious and uncomfortable, yet something in me wanted more. Christy sat at the table with me, asking different questions but always coming back to, “Am I surrounded by darkness?”
I wanted to scream, “You don't know me,” and run, but instead, I was frozen.
Later, the three of us are in private, and Christy is trying to break through the barrier I have built around me. The enemy was fighting hard, knowing and using all my weaknesses to keep hold on me. I was able to finally cry for help.
They prayed over me. I asked the Lord to take it all. I could not do it any longer. I released everything to Him.
I was free.
Free is not a word I have ever known. A feeling I never believed was real. But I was, and it felt amazing. I was baptized the next afternoon without any hesitation. I stepped in that water. I came up floating. I had absolutely nothing holding me down any longer.
Retreat 2026
Year three: no anxiety going into it, till I parked, that is. This year, I prayed for the Lord to open my heart to anything and everything He had planned for me this retreat. So once I got to the house, fear of my recent prayers hit, but I was ready.
During one of our group activities, we sat in silence while the leaders prayed for each of us individually. I asked the Lord to just tell me what it was, that I am ready to do His will.
He spoke the word leadership to me.
I had just taken a new job out of the leadership role and wasn't sure how I was feeling about it. Him speaking that to me made me even more unsure.
When Christy prayed over me, she said, “Elisa, the Holy Spirit is telling me you have been dabbling in the wrong leadership roles, and it's time to move into your role in ministry leadership.”
Wait!! What???
This year brought a completely different experience. I spoke in our group, talked with many different women, and gave my testimony of the last year of my life.
Since the retreat of 2025, I have surrendered my Xanax that I was heavily dependent on and have not taken any since. I still struggle at times with anxiety, and the urge to take Xanax is there, but I am able to work through those moments with prayer.
The weight of everything I carried has been removed, and I no longer have the guilt, shame, or feeling of worthlessness. My nightmares rarely find me in my sleep, and when they do, it's not a paralyzing situation as it had been in the past. The triggers of my past that would once stop me in my tracks and shut me down hold no power over me.
I was raised in church, and my Mom’s faith was the strongest. You would often find her reading her Bible. When she got sick, her faith never shifted.
I first experienced His miracles at 18 when I had been struggling with a migraine so severe I was not able to function. I had to quit school in the second semester of my Junior year and could not walk without assistance. Numerous doctor visits, tests, a hospital stay, medications, and then my Mom's friend invited us to her church to pray over me.
They anointed me with oil and prayed. I left that church migraine free after SEVEN months of suffering. I was able to return for my senior year and graduate with my class.
Even though I was raised in church, I witnessed my Mom's faith and even experienced His miracle. I allowed the devil to control my thoughts. Anger, guilt, shame, and feelings of worthlessness consumed me. I built walls to protect myself, to hide who I thought I was.
Those feelings are gone. I know my past is not who I am. They were things that happened to me. They do not define me.
I am HIS daughter.
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